Diary of an 'Elf Publisher

(or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Kill the Algorithm)

By Lloyd Lewis (Yes, the one who used to be on Amazon. Briefly. Like a bad Tinder date.)

Let me tell you a story. Not of Welsh dragons or legendary quests, but of mundane dashboards. Of endless terms & conditions. Of innumerable boxes to tick relentlessly until you find yourself questioning the very essence of your life choices. Of metadata fields exuding all the charm of damp cardboard. Of cryptic "review holds" and whispering shadows lurking in the backend of Apple Books.

This was our brief, ill-fated dalliance with the giants, Amazon and Apple Books.

What went awry?

Nothing catastrophic per se. Just... everything.

We aspired to release something unique. Poetic. Glitched. A fusion of dark fiction, seething disabled rage, haunting war poetry and recursive timelines.

What did we receive instead?

"Interest Age: 12+"

“Suggested Category: Self-help / Inspirational”

"Your content is under review for reasons we will never disclose."

A sales dashboard that made Minesweeper look like the pinnacle of user-friendliness.

And a profound, unshakeable sensation that we were nourishing something we simply did not believe in.

So we departed.

No dramatic outburst. No flaming bag of mischief left on Jeff Bezos’ porch (though the temptation lingered).

Just a quiet retreat from publishing. A cleansing scrub in the metaphorical shower. A sobering introspection.

We realised something pivotal: we're not mere content creators. We're authors. Artists. Zinemakers. Saboteurs.

And Amazon? Apple? They’re perfectly suitable for some. But for us?

It felt like presenting poetry at a marketing seminar.

So here’s what we’re doing instead:

We’ve shifted everything to Art of FACELESS on Shopify — our own peculiar corner of the internet, independent, eccentric, and entirely ours.

We’ll be:

Publishing fiction, poetry, and zines in our own distinctive way.

Utilising Ghost for our long-form essays and transmissions.

Selling exclusively through Shopify — no intermediaries, no algorithms.

Supporting other disabled, outsider, and experimental creators as we blossom.

And yes, continuing to send the occasional transmission to bewilder the bots.

No judgment here. Truly.

If you’re an author utilising Amazon or Apple — good for you. You do what suits you best.

We tried it. It didn’t resonate. No moral superiority here — just gut instinct and a creative itch.

But if you do feel uneasy about feeding the machine, come explore what we’re building.

You might find the edges intriguing.

Thanks for reading.

LL